Thursday, July 3, 2008
now that chinese oral is over, i feel even more relieve. now all i can think abt is where have i gone wrong in all my failures in friendship, was it just depression, self-obsessed thoughts and doubt? i know that i commit my best in friendship but i feel scared to open up. im back to the shy person i was back in primary school, im afraid of talking to ppl. however, ive prayed strongly and persistently that i would be able to make up with the two of them, but im afraid i dont have enough courage to really ask them for a chance at redemption. i feel as if im holding on to a shaky branch of a tree not knowing whether i will land on a bed of roses or a bunch of vines. im scared of being alone nxt yr, im scared of opening up and im scared of losing friends in the first place. but without any pain in relationships, there would no joy in it either. im caught in the middle, not knowing what to do to redeem this friendship that i sincerely treasure...
Liam's plane at 8:32 AM